The Cancer Diaries

[Stardust]

Best wishes to your family, Manders. Hopefully her accepting it will make it easier on her now. Maybe on you guys too.

[Manders]

So, another update. She's changed her mind again and is restarting chemo Monday.

Women. Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em.

[Yannaria]

well, whatever she chooses, enjoy your time with her manders.

[Manders]

I am certainly doing that.

So, I'd say it's about time for another update. She's currently at the hospital receiving her chemo treatment, though she'll probably be home later today or tomorrow. She's excited because, after this, she has only two more treatments. Then, of course, the doctor's will re-evaluate the situation and decide where to proceed from here.

She's finally been approved for disability and should be receiving her first check from that in the next day or two, so that will greatly help the two of them to live a bit more comfortably.

She got two finches, a male and a female. She adores them, but I think they're annoying because they make noise non-stop! Haha.

The latest I heard, all her blood and platelet counts are really low, if not non-existent, so in all honesty, it doesn't look too promising for her. But, then again, I'm not a doctor nor do I proclaim to know all about cancer, so I
could be way off.

Time will tell.

[Iso]

[Captain Murphy]

Best of luck on the upcoming news from the doctors manders!

[Manders]

Wow, it really has been a while since I updated this. Sorry, guys.

So, Mom's doing pretty well. She had her penultimate chemo treatment last week. The doctors told her that these last two treatments would be the worst that she'd had, in regards to side effects and potency of the dosage, and she's definitely seeing the difference. After all the other treatments, she'd have MAYBE one day of being under the weather from side effects, but she's had several days as such since this last treatment. The hubby and I went over there Wednesday to spend time with her. We rented The Heat (with Melissa McCarthy and Sandra Bullock) and watched it with them. Very funny. She was doing really well that night, so that was good.

She did say that the doctors are pretty much resolute that they're going to extract all her teeth once her treatments are completed. She's actually looking forward to this because,
apparently, her teeth ache all the time now. I don't know if that's caused by the treatments or not, but I gathered that it, at least mostly, is. I say whatever it takes for her to feel better in ALL aspects.

She did say one thing. She said there's no way in hell she's going into the hospital for her last chemo treatment the week of Thanksgiving. She'll likely be admitted the Monday afterwards. We're all hoping for the best. All we know so far is that she'll have another bone marrow scrape once the chemo is done, then they'll know what to do from there.

[Yannaria]

If she keeps one tooth she'll be on par with most people from Maine

[rezombad]

Is there medicinal marijuanna in texas manders?

[Yannaria]

Is there medicinal marijuanna in texas manders?

"Is there a liberal thing in Texas?"

[Manders]

No, there is not medicinal marijuana in Texas. And shut up, Yanni!

So, for the latest. Her chemo treatments are done. She got testing done Jan 6th to gauge her progress. Her lymph nodes are back to normal, her spleen is back to normal, and her liver is JUST about back to normal. (Normal referring to the size of these organs/glands.) They didn't do another bone marrow scrape because her blood counts were pretty poor, but they rescheduled it, and it's going to be done Monday.

They are stating that it LOOKS like she's in remission. They'll be more sure after the scrape results.

THANK YOU, JESUS!!

[Mcdonalds]

Glad to see you came back with good news

[Manders]

Glad to see you came back with good news

Not more glad than I am.

So, somewhat relatedly, I'm done with my monthly hair cuts, and I'm really not looking forward to that awkward phase that'll hit in the next 4-6 months, most likely. I mean, it was worth it to support her, but man. It's gonna be bad.

[Mcdonalds]

Glad to see you came back with good news

Not more glad than I am.

---

[Stardust]

Well that's great news! Must be a relief to finally be done with the treatments - I know you said she was thinking about quitting a while back. Good thing she didn't. Best of luck with the scrape results! Hopefully the doctors are right to be optimistic.

[Manders]

Well that's great news! Must be a relief to finally be done with the treatments - I know you said she was thinking about quitting a while back. Good thing she didn't. Best of luck with the scrape results! Hopefully the doctors are right to be optimistic.

Yeah, I'm still not sure what convinced her to not stop treatment, but I'm definitely happy that she didn't. I didn't want her to, but what could I do? Get mad at her? I have NO idea how I would handle having Cancer myself, so all I can do is support her, even if I don't like her decisions.

Luckily, she continued and is doing well. She was sick about a week ago, and someone was like, "See, it's not gone! She got sick!!" Well, no SHIT she got sick! She just spent 8 months KILLING her
immune system to try to beat Cancer, and it's fucking flu season, you numb nuts!! (I was much nicer about it IRL, but seriously. People should THINK before they SPEAK.)

[Iso]

Good!

[Manders]

Where to begin?

So, apparently the cancer is not in remission. It's out of her spleen and lymph nodes, but it's still in her bone marrow, so she's going to have to undergo more chemo, though this'll be outpatient. She's had 2 heart attacks in the past 2 months, the most recent about 2 weeks ago. They put a stint in the offending artery after this second one. Then, about 3 days after being released for that, she got pneumonia and was hospitalized for a week. Yesterday, we took her to Parkland to get her prescriptions, and she confessed to me that she doesn't believe she's going to win this battle anymore.

I have no idea what to do with this information. She made me promise not to tell her daughters, but I did tell the hubby. He says she just said it because she didn't feel good (and she didn't. I'm fucking pissed at the hospital for releasing her so soon.) but with everything that's going on with her body, I
truly believe she feels this way, and all I know is if she gives up the fight, she WILL lose.

Yeah...I have no idea what to do.

[Col. Khaddafi]

damn, that is some bad news. I see why she would be discouraged its a real kick in the nuts.

what can I say, there is really no "right" advice in such situation. I'd ask doctors for a realistic estimate of the remission probabilities, if it is something like 10-20% it might be worth just to peace with your inner self and just start palliative treatments for the pain. As someone who witnessed his grandfather die from intestine cancer I can only say that this is a very though decision to take.

Talk it out with your mom, and then consult with your doctors. And hang on in there

[Kaitscralt]

[Manders]

So, I believe an update is in order!

She never had to have more chemo. It's still in her marrow, but it's not spreading or growing, so her doctor's isn't as concerned about her cancer as he is her heart. She hasn't had anymore heart attacks or anything like that. She just needs to have a doctor monitoring her.

She moved to Arkansas to start over with her boyfriend, and it really was the best decision they could have made. He found a great job within a week of moving there, and she's absolutely loving the country life. They're trying to convince r_0 and I to move up there with them, but that's not happening.

[Col. Khaddafi]

Hey Manders, nice to see you back! Also, I'm glad for her, I must confess at this point she had a big chance of having passed out.

Anyway, that she is needing to take less agressive treatment is fine, so here's to hoping she continues recovering.

[Manders]

And, two months later, I return again! Haha

[rianalnn]

K bye!

[Manders]

I would have posted an update...but there's nothing to update! She's great.

[Kaitscralt]

she's gone

[Manders]

Go away.

[rianalnn]

Stop teasing us with your presence.

[Manders]

I'm pretty sure I'm welcome here whenever the mood strikes. Is that not the case?

Oh, wait...

[rianalnn]

That literally has nothing to do with my post.

[hamfactorial]

Literally nothing

[Manders]

Literally nothing?

Oh, in that case...

I still don't care.

[Kaitscralt]

Why is kpaca always so damn sensitive when Manders is around

Did the two of you cyber or something

[Manders]

Kpain and I haven't talked in a long time. Don't really get on AIM anymore.

Maybe we's psychically linked?

[Kaitscralt]

no... i don't think so

[Manders]

Then IDK why he's more sensitive when I'm around.

I haven't seen a post of his since I've come back, though, so...

Where, exactly, is he being more sensitive?

[Kaitscralt]

The way he always says you shouldn't post because you're just going to leave again?

[Kaitscralt]

Try to keep up, good god damn

[Manders]

...that's not ria, the Aussie douchebag?

Someone coulda fucking told me! Jeez.

I'll stop being an ass now.

[Manders]

And fuck off, k8.